The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.
War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway.
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
Answering Machine Saying: Sorry I can’t get to the phone right now because my girlfriend and I are doing our favorite thing together. Personally I like doing it up and down, while she likes doing it side-to-side r-e-a-l slow... So I’ll get back to you when we finish brushing our teeth.
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
Why do nerds confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because OCT31=DEC25
The few that I enjoyed. Hope you enjoyed reading them too =).
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