shu

Plans. Something to get you to where you wanna be.

I used to have plans. But they weren't for getting me to something, more like getting me away from something. I used to think about my plan in every spare moment, because, of course I wanted to make sure that it wouldn't fail. That my plan would succeed.

But what happens when the thing I wanted to get away from leaves my life because of another incident? Suddenly all the plans I made were of no use to me anymore. Not because it wasn't a good feasible plan, but because I knew it was a much longer timeline to happiness, to a life of my choice.

Now? I have no plans. I believe that trying to get away from something is much stronger motivation than aiming towards something. People will tell you to reach for the stars. And you may try, try quite hard in fact, but you won't try as hard if the ground around you was filled with rotting rubbish rather than the tiled floor it is now.

After all, the stars are pretty, but the tiled floor ain't so bad. 

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superheroes.

Just watched this last night and I enjoyed it far more than I thought I would.

Who knew watching an animated film about 'imaginary characters' would be so entertaining?

One thing that was important in the film was the concept of believing. Believing and having faith that somewhere out there were characters who would bring joy and wonder to all the little children in the world. That to children it was what keeps them childlike.

And that left me wondering, when do we grow up?

When is it that we realise that the world isn't all about sweet dreams and presents and fun? When do we give up on our dreams in pursuit of more 'practical' paths? 

I am pretty sure that there are little to no children out there who when asked "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" will answer with investment banker or accountant. These are jobs that have been created over time because someone decided that it'd be a great way to overcharge people for services that they could carry out themselves. 

When I was a kid, I used to have this book called "I want to be the President" I think. At one point in my life I would actually say that I wanted to grow up to be the President. Then as I grew up I thought it was impossible cause I wasn't American and also cause I was a girl. For some reason there was just this stigma that women couldn't be in roles of leadership cause it was meant to be the man's job.

While I'm pretty certain I wouldn't actually have wanted to be the President when I grew older, that is an example of how dreams of a child can be crushed so easily due to society's 'rules'. 'Rules' that say money is more important than being happy, that your reputation is more important than being honest to yourself. 

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snowman.

Caffeine kick.

I've never been one to say I must have a cup of coffee every morning. I know many people who need their caffeine kick in the morning before they do anything otherwise they just don't function well. But since I don't feel that caffeine affects me that much since I can still pretty much sleep soundly even after having a cup of coffee or multiple cups of tea, I never really understood this caffeine kick.

However, I think today is the first time ever I drank coffee because I was hoping for a caffeine kick. I had an exam in the morning and since I haven't been waking up early for the past weeks, I knew that it would be difficult for me to focus on the exam. So first thing I did was make myself a cup of coffee in hopes that it would jolt my brain awake for long enough.

And it worked! Caffeine takes about 45 minutes to kick in and is meant to last between 2-4 hours. My exam was at 9.45am and I think those numbers are more or less accurate as I had my coffee at half 8 and by the end of the exams I could feel that my brain had slowed down a little in comparison to the start of the exam where I wrote my essays pretty quickly.

Has this converted me to a daily coffee drinker though?

Nahh. Other than exams and assignments I don't think I need to give my brain that kick on a daily basis. Well at least not now, maybe when I start working.

If you're wondering how I prefer to take my coffee?

Black with two sugars.

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strung along.

There usually is always a reason.

Sometimes the truth is simple, sometimes it is not.

You know the past, but choose to ignore it when making present decisions.

Honestly, it can still surprise me at times how a person's true personality does not exactly tally with the person they are in a crowd.

And here I thought that drama was a teenage thing.

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residence.

During exam time as a way of destressing I like to watch shows or movies that require little to no brain power. Haha. The more bimbotic the better I would say.

Usually my go to show is Jersey Shore. Judge me if you will but each episode is just forty minutes of entertaining drama where I don't need to think at all. But seeing as I've already watched all available episodes, I had to find something new.

So I turned to Sex and the City. The movie. Ended up watching the sequel as well.

Needless to say, I loved both of it. Yes the sequel had the worst storyline ever. But the clothes more than made up for it. Oh to have such a glamorous wardrobe.

Back to the point of this post.

I think Carrie Bradshaw at the end of the movie is exactly where I could only hope to be.

Watching a black and white movie with the man she loves.
In a marriage where they both agree not to have kids.
Making a living from writing.
With a close knit group of friends.

What dreams. 

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splash.

Just a little piece that I think everyone should read.

If They're Not Husband or Wifey Material, They're Not Worth It. 

I completely agree with the article. I mean, how many people now can say that they would be more than happy to marry their current boyfriend/girlfriend. Guessing that most would say no. That their current relationship is only good for now but not for a serious long term thing.

So why bother in the first place? Why go into a relationship in which you can't see a future? Knowing that one day somebody's heart is going to be broken in two. Knowing that tears are going to be shed.

Perhaps it's just me that looks too far ahead. 

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safe and sound.

Perhaps this opinion of mine may change when I am put into that situation, but for the moment, I don't see why some people don't like it when their significant other checks out a member of the opposite sex.

After all all they're doing is looking. So if you are afraid that your significant other is gonna leave you and run off just because someone is hot, clearly your relationship needs major strengthening.

It's like saying that if you have a pet dog at home, that you are not allowed to think that other dogs are cute because it might mean that you are gonna give your dog away for a cuter one. What makes the dog yours is not the fact that it is the best looking one out there, but because it has been there for you every time you come home.

So the same goes for relationships. Nothing wrong with admiring the 'view' ;). 

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autumn.

Current favourite song is a Korean one.

Not that I'm into Kpop again. Just that this song is so freaking nice. And emo. Yes I like emo songs.

On Rainy Days by B2ST. 

That's pronounced beast.

Basically the songs bout how the guy is emo-ing on a rainy day. Constantly thinking of the girl that he used to be with.

It has got me thinking though. If a guy is truly in love with a girl and they part. Will he only think of her when the weather is gloomy? I know rainy weather is like the perfect moment to emo. But if you really did love her shouldn't you be thinking of her even when it's sunny? Even more perhaps. That when there is perfect weather you'd think of her cause you wanna share such a perfect moment with her.

Maybe it's just me overthinking as usual.

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post.

Haha. How true.

For some reason, there's always a greater sense of accomplishment when you finish your work at the 11th hour. 

A greater adrenaline rush that makes you work faster.

Let's say if you had started on the assignment a week ago, and you would be spend an hour on it everyday. In a week, you would have spent 7 hours. But if you only start the assignment a day or two before the due date, I bet the time can be cut in half. 

Sense of urgency will force you to work faster and avoid distractions. 

Not that I'm encouraging last minute work.

But just saying. 

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instant.

Everything in life boils down to the choices you make.

As cliched as it may sound, there is no better way to put it.

While we try to make the good or right choice all the time, there will be times when you make the wrong one. I wonder though, how many of us unknowingly made it? Cause I know for me, there are instances where I know for a fact that the decision I'm going to make is not quite the right one.

But I make it anyway.

Why?

Just so I can know what it was like. I mean, if I made the right choices all the time, life would be pretty boring I think. And it's these mistakes that make a story worth telling ;). 

Though I'm careful to avoid any wrong decisions that could forever screw up my life.

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bite.

Everybody dreams.

Whether you remember your dreams is however a different issue.

If you do, do you believe that your dreams have meaning? I'm sure every single thing that appeared in your dream was there for a reason but do you think it's possible to make a general guess of the meaning with the help of a dream dictionary? Or do the same things in different people's dreams carry different meanings depending on the individual.

For example if you dreamt of fish,

Fish

To see fish swimming in your dream, signifies insights from your unconscious mind. Thus to catch a fish, represents insights which have been brought to the surface. Alternatively, a fish swimming in your dream may symbolize conception. Some women dream of swimming fish when they get pregnant. The fish is also an ancient symbol of Christianity and Christian beliefs. Consider the common phrases "like a cold fish", "fish out of water" or something that is "fishy" about a situation. It may also imply a slippery or elusive situation. Perhaps your dream could be telling you that "there are plenty of other fish in the sea", with regards to some relationship issue.

To dream that you are eating fish, symbolizes your beliefs, spirituality, luck, energy and nourishment. It is food for the soul.

To dream of cooking fish, indicates that you are incorporating your new realizations with your spiritual feelings and knowledge.  

To dream that you are cleaning fish, suggests that you are altering  your emotional expression in a way that will be presentable to others. You are censoring yourself and not expressing how you completely feel.

Interesting right?

I wish someone would interpret my dreams for me.

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sanctuary.

Spent practically the entire day at Curve.

For what?

Laundry Festival.

No. It does not involve doing laundry okay =P.

It's actually a music festival where loads of local acts perform. Started as early as 2pm and goes on all the way till closing time.

Didn't actually watch everything since it was outdoors. So kept going in and out whenever it got too hot. Some acts were of course better than others. Overall it's nice to know that the music scene in Malaysia is alive and kicking.

Something that did cross my mind. How many people there were actually there to enjoy the music or were they just there to support a friend?

Don't get me wrong, nothing wrong with supporting a friend. But what about the other acts? I mean, if you're only there to support your friend, it's likely that they'd go off after their friend's performance instead of staying on to catch the other acts.

It also means that only people with friends in the music business will be exposed to our local talent. Does that mean that those who don't happen to have friends in the scene will be deprived of the music? Word of mouth does work. To a certain extent I suppose.

Hmmm. Wonder whether this only happens in Malaysia?

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city.

I'm gonna make an assumption here

that most people who get into relationships before they're 20 are just looking for a 'Right Now' not a 'For The Rest Of My Life'. (Feel free to comment if you think otherwise)

Given my assumption,

I really don't understand why people want relationships?

It's like you know that at one point, you are going to break up and there's going to be heartbreak and lots of tears. Maybe some yelling and throwing of stuff. (If it ended on a bad note)

So does that mean relationships are always good enough to compensate for the bad at the end? I think not. Yet, people are so willing to jump into one. Not to mention the fact that it's not always smooth sailing DURING the relationship. I would say that bad stuff during relationship + breakup > good part of relationship.

Haha. My objective view on it. Perhaps when I'm actually in a relationship I'll be able to understand why people do stupid things and make stupid decisions all for the sake of love.

But then again, you only get the rainbow after the rain.

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sonata.

I can honestly tell you that growing up I didn't question many things. I just went with the flow and took what life gave me.

But now, I can't help but question some things.

Like what people perceive education to be.

Education:

the knowledge and development resulting from an educational process [Merriam-Webster's dictionary]

the process of teaching or learning in school or college; or the knowledge you get from this [Cambridge dictionary]

Does anything in there even suggest that the meaning of education is

something you need to make more money so that you can have more power in this world?

or

a tool to make you feel that you are a class above those who don't have the same education as you?

In fact, the word education comes from the Latin term 'educere' which means to bring out. Basically to bring forth the potential that a person has within. Not to force knowledge onto people.

Yet the true meaning of education has been lost over the years. Now, it's just a numbers game. How many A's can you get, how much money can you earn after this.

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jam.

Opposites attract or birds of a feather flock together?

Which one do you believe in more?

Gah. I've totally lost my blogging mojo.

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lace.

People say,

Learn from the past.

Live in the present.

Look to the future.

BUT

What if I'm really bad at multi-tasking??

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cherry.

With the end of exams drawing near, it also indicates the beginning of something much bigger that almost everyone I know is excited about.

The World Cup.

Now, I have nothing against football or the people who seem to be so crazy in love with the sport.

But what I don't understand is how some people I know who NEVER bother with football on a regular basis, suddenly get so hyped up for the World Cup. Someone even told me that they hate football but because it's the World Cup they're supportive of it.

I mean, for me, so what if it only happens once every four years. Or that it involves loads of countries. I've never been a football fan so I see no reason to start now just because the rest of the world is so into it.

What's more, how do people pick a team to support? Do you actually do research to see which team you think actually has good strategies, skills or do most just go with the popular ones that they've heard of? Or for some it might even be which team has the best looking players.

Haha. No offence to any of you who jumped on the bandwagon. Just expressing some of my thoughts.

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retreat.

You know why those who go overseas at an earlier age usually do better in their studies?

No, it's not because they've learned to mature and take responsibility. It's mainly cause their parents aren't there.

How is that possible you ask? After all, most need parents to give them the push to actually study.

Read on and you'll understand.

How many of you have been forced to go out with your family before an exam. Despite you telling your parents that you want to stay at home to study, they tell you that you should take a break cause studying all the time isn't good. For most of us I'd believe, we get these moods where we're really gung ho about studying and parents interrupting is the one thing that can cause you to lose the studying drive.

On the other hand, you're done with studying and want to go out and have a nice dinner with your friends. What do your parents say about this? "Don't waste time, you should be studying". The irony is that if you hadn't gone out with your friends, your parents would have made you go out for dinner with the family. So ultimately your time is spent on something you didn't really want to just because your parents think that friends are not as important as family.

Just my opinion.

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oil.

As a kid, didn't you feel that adults kept making you confused?

Or maybe it was just me.

But when results come back and let's say I got 94(a pretty good mark), my parents would always ask me who got the highest in class. And then instead of telling me that 94 is good, they'd say I should have worked harder to score the highest mark in class. After all, we should always attempt to better ourselves.

Yet when it comes to buying things, they'd always say that I should think of the poor children in the world who can't afford as many nice things as me.

How is that confusing you ask??

Well, excuse me but as a kid, am I suppose to be comparing myself to those better than me or worse than me??? No such thing as the best of both worlds okay.

Hmm. Now that it's all typed out it seems kinda silly. Ah well.

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fame.

Hmm. This may not apply to all of you.

But don't you feel that you're been lied to about maths since young??

When you were in primary your teachers always told you that you must use the bigger number to subtract the smaller number.

For example: 6-10 is X but 10-6 is √

Then in secondary you find out that it is actually possible. You'd just end up with a negative number. And then your secondary teacher teaches you how to square root numbers. But you can only square root positive numbers.

For example: √9=3 but √-9 is maths error.

And now finally in A-levels. You find out that there is such a thing as √-1.

No wonder kids always feels like adults lie to them.

Haha. Just something I thought of today.

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